getting unstuck
It's a great feeling to be moving full speed ahead, catching the wave, swimming in the flow, or enjoying whatever kind of metaphor for awesome success happens to surface as you move warp speed toward your goal. In reality though, this feeling does not happen nearly as often as we'd like it to, and it can seem more common to feel like you're stuck in the mud.
So if you feel this way, how do you fix it? How do you get moving again? This is one of the main reasons people contact life coaches--because they're spinning their wheels and feeling like crap. There are a handful of ways you can deal with this kind of situation and get back in the saddle. And none of them involve horrendous metaphors. I promise!
- Rest. Yeah, you may feel like you've done enough of this because you haven't gotten anything done, but sometimes we're just burned out and trying to push ourselves past it won't work. In this situation radical self-care is exactly the prescription you need, along with a little faith that things will get better. I've found that people have a tendency to severely underestimate just how exhausted they are and what it will take to get back to feeling inspired again.
Partially this is because we're so used to living in a state of fight-or-flight, a high-adrenaline rush to be everywhere and do All the Things. As we get older, our ability to keep up this insanity declines, and we just get used to constant fatigue, brain fog, and general lack of energy. Give your body, mind, and spirit a break, and by break, I don't mean a quick manicure in between grocery shopping and picking up the kids. You may need adrenal support, some serious naps, and a period of letting yourself "slack off" until you're really up for getting going again. - Remember your "Why." A lot of times when we're flagging in our dedication to something, it's because we've lost our connection with why we wanted to do it in the first place. Take the time to envision what you were thinking of when you first came up with your goal, or get even more specific and write out why you want to be doing what you're doing just in case you never really homed in on that to begin with.
When we first start out on a project or an endeavor, we're usually excited about it. Maybe we started a new web page and got all excited at the novelty, or bought a new yoga tape and workout wear. The emotional engagement with a goal is crucial, and it's one we tend to lose as the novelty wears off and our glorious goal is now just another thing on the to-do list. Get excited! Stay involved! - Meditate. A little stillness goes a long way toward enabling motion. Sometimes we don't realize how much we're self-sabotaging ourselves until we sit quietly enough to notice those limiting thoughts bubbling up into the empty space. You may not think you're doing this, but we all have resistance to progress in one fashion or another, and the inner critic gets especially loud when it's afraid we're not paying attention to it.
- Small changes can make a huge difference. Everything is energy. and it doesn't take a lot of energy to budge a system out of equilibrium. If you're at a low point, making a few minor changes in your routine can be enough to push you out of your doldrums. Stretching for a few minutes in the morning, starting to take vitamins, or just drinking more water can do a lot for your energy. You don't need to overhaul everything in order to see progress.
- Make time for gratitude. It's commonly said that to get what you want you simply need to put out your desire into the universe. While this is necessary, it's not sufficient, and it's a myth that overlooks some crucial steps. As humans, we tend to focus on what we don't have, and this sense of lack undermines our power to make things happen even if we don't notice (see the above bullet item on meditation).
The only way NOT to come from a place of lack is to be aware of what you do have and be grateful for it. It's not enough to just remind yourself or make a list, though that's a good step. Take a few seconds to connect emotionally and feel good about what you say you're grateful for.
